I Know This Much Is True...God Blessed The Broken Road That Lead Me Straight To You...

I'm sitting here...crying, wondering what's next. My mom seems to have slipped into a depression and I feel asthough I'm next. Nothing's going right for our family right now...things keep breaking and having to be replaced, my mom can't find a job. My sister's constantly off in Victoria or who knows where, doing what, having a grand old time. I'm stuck here, working my ass off to try and help my family to stay afloat and now my mom's talking about sending all of my cats to be adopted and having my dog put down. My dad works all day, has no clue anything that's been going on and I'm finally breaking down.

Yesterday was my first actual day off in 5 days and I spent it doing absolutely nothing, thinking about someone I definately shouldn't be thinking about. And no, it's probably not who you're thinking of. Everything's falling appart, I'm really sick and I've had a prescription for antibiotics for the several infections running through my body right now for about a week and can't afford to get it. I feel guilty for needing to get new work clothes with my paycheck tomorrow and for having to pay my $100 enrollment fee for school. Maybe I should wait another year...I don't know if I can do this.

For now, I guess I'll just sit here and continue to cry while listening to The Broken Road by Rascal Flatts. I'll leave some lyrics for you guys so that you can understand a little. I guess I'll talk to you guys later, maybe I won't...knowing what's to come and waiting is so fucking hard and I dunno if I can do it.

"I set out on a narrow way, many years ago, hoping I would find true love along the broken road. I got lost a time or two, wipped my brow, kept pushing through. I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you. Every long lost dream, led me to where you are. Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars, pointing me on my way into your loving arms. This much I know is true, that god blessed the broken road that led me straight to you, yes he did. I think about the years I've spent just passing through. I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you. But you just smile and take my hand, you've been there, you understand. It's just part of a grander plan that's coming true. Every long lost dream, led me to where you are. Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars, pointing me on my way into your loving arms."

Ok that's all I'm going to type out cause I can't keep up with the song and really don't feel like trying anymore. That's all I've got to say.