Lost & Lonely

Well I've been in a bad mood lately. That about sums it up. Yesterday was shit. I spent my day off at home with my sister...and then home alone. Today was a bit better...went to my aunt's this morning for brunch with my Oma, Opa, Aunt, Uncle, Cousin and relatives that are over from Holland. There was way too much dutch for my liking and I wanted to shoot myself. I got home and then headed out shopping with my mom which was generally good, yet disappointing since neither of us found much. We both managed to find new bras and underwear (yes you all needed to know that) and I found a pair of black capris at Reitmans which I love, but then I couldn't find any black sandles under $80 to go with them. I want to wear them to work but that's not gunna happen till I get the shoes. Andrea called me back but was too tired to do anything today. Chelsea and Alex are watching movies, Tasha's in New West...Megan's probably either at work or sleeping cause lastnight was dry grad. Phil called but I haven't phoned him back yet. I feel as though my friendship with Andrea has become a joke...almost like it means nothing to her anymore...like I'm some obligation that she couldn't care less about. I'm sorry but that's the truth. I miss Tasha like crazy, Phil's driving me insane, I hate my sister for not giving a shit about our family, I wish Megan lived closer and didn't work when I'm not so that we could actually see eachother, I wish Meagan wasn't pregnant and married and living in Duncan. I wish so much that things could just be OK for once. Is it me? Am I going crazy??? I get two days off and I see no one. I feel like I have no one to see. Is anyone out there?! Argh! I just dunno anymore. I hope that no one takes offense by this blog entry, I really do love you all, but I also miss you all more than anything. Well it's almost time to wash my hair dye out so I gtg. Talk to you guys later.